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Back Story: Remember in this week’s This Week you read about my upcoming eye surgery and the curiosity (to put it mildly) about why I was being admitted to the hospital two days before surgery SLASH I’m messing with the timeline here, don’t be alarmed if you’re confused. It’s confusing.

In next week’s This Week in South Korea post you’ll read the short (but still very aggravating) story of my day spent getting admitted to the hospital two days ahead of my eye surgery. But I felt it was far too long for the This Week post (next week) so am making it a stand-alone post…if you want to read a lot of me complaining and being aggravated (word of the week), go ahead. If not, by all means, scroll on to the next post, there’s nothing to see here.

PS: no pictures.

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Monday, June 2 – two days before my surgery is scheduled

I had an 8:45am appt with the nephrologist to talk about my kidney again…I guess they need to check on whatever medical issues you have before going into surgery. I’m grateful I didn’t have to see the psychiatrist and get the “6 years is too long to be on welbutrin” speech again. Neph Dr shared about my low functioning kidney (old news to me at this point, have been hearing about it since summer 2021). Anyway, she also mentioned my “Korea Cholesterol,” which a dr talked to me about LAST summer before I had the kidney procedure but no one ever did anything with that information even though I asked someone, I forget who, about it.

I call it my Korea Cholesterol because I’ve never had a cholesterol issue before coming here. Anyway, she put me on a statin, which I’ve heard conflicting views on but…I’ll give it a try. I’ll go back to see her end of July to see if there’s any change to my cholesterol level AND she said it COULD help my kidney function.

Okay, so, finished with that by 9:15. But I’d been told to check-in at admissions at 11, so I waited at the hospital as it wasn’t really enough time to be worth going home and then returning. I had a not very good, expensive, breakfast in a cafe in the hospital, sat at a very unfortunate chair:desk ratio situation in the lounge area of the hospital to get some remote work out of the way, then got some snacks from 7-11 (also in the hospital) to put in the fridge in the hospital room. I have not been a big fan of the food I’ve had here, so…forewarned is fore-armed.

At the main hospital check-in, it’s a whole process…with ticketing and payment kiosks, prescription pick-up windows, general cashier/scheduling windows, and admission/discharge windows. I was supposed to be going to A/D but the kiosk kept giving my tickets for general windows, so I’d wait my turn then go up and try to explain that I was really supposed to be at admissions, but the kiosk didn’t give me a ticket for admissions, could they please help me. At the first window, they didn’t understand. They look at their computer, they look at my paperwork, they look at my translator app where I’ve tried to explain and they’re just like “why are you here?” Finally she got it (I think) and told me to go back to the main kiosk and now I’d get the right # for A/D. Okay. Back to kiosk. Still got a general window ticket. waited AGAIN, when it was my turn I went to different window, started explaining all over again, but this one looks at her computer and is saying something about money. I said I already paid for this morning’s appt…surely they weren’t already charging me for the surgery?

Turns out I was due a refund from last week’s eye exams and opthalmology consultation because at that time none of us were aware that I was still covered by the Korean National Health Insurance. But now they know, so I get a refund. Nice. But she wants to wire it to my Korean bank. And I want it back on the card I used. I can’t move (well, maybe I can, but I don’t know how and there’s going to be a fee involved) money from Korean to American bank. I’ve only wired US to Korea, never Korea to US, and the money isn’t as immediately useful to me in the Korean back as it would be just back on the original card (most useful) or in my US account (second most useful). Back and forth back and forth, I don’t have my bank book with me, here’s my ARC (Alien Resident Card), here’s my passport, oh wait, I found my bank # in my phone…all this takes a lot of translation apping and gesturing. Finally that’s done (the money will be in your Korean bank in 2 days, okay fine whatever okay), and she writes an A/D window # on the bank of my kiosk ticket (why didn’t the first person just do that?) and I sit down to wait. In a few minutes I hear my name being called beh-TEE! beh-TEE! And it’s the bank refund girl…and she says the money will be there today, that my bank had been asleep when she first tried to do it. I understand none of this cuz…what does my bank have to do with anything if she’s just moving money from the Korean hospital to my Korean bank account. Anyway, okay, whatever.

FINALLY…it’s now 11;40 and I’ve been trying to check-in to admissions for 45 minutes. I FINALLY get to the A/D window and he goes, you were supposed to check in at 11am. AARRGGHH!!! I said I’ve Been Trying!!! However, he says…your admission time has been changed to 2pm.

(this is a blank paragraph) (blank like my face)

I never noticed before, that the words face and cafe have the same four letters in them.

Internally, I’m all WTF &*%^&&^^%!!! but outwardly I’m One Big Sigh and an insincerely smiling KAMSAMNIDA. I could have gone home at 9:30 when I was done with the nephrologist. I didn’t need to lug all my hospital and work stuff all over up and down. I could have been in the comfort of my own room.

I was already aggravated about the repeat eye surgery in the first place. I’m INCREDIBLY aggravated that I have to check into the hospital TWO DAYS before the surgery. And now I’m DOUBLY INCREDIBLY aggravated that they have wasted my time and my morning.

Those of you who have been here for awhile KNOW how valuable my time is to me. Don’t Waste MY Time! That’s MY time. Don’t mess with it.

So I go home. Turn on the ac (it’s gross and humid out), get out of my sweat soaked clothes, put my nightgown on, and get in bed. I doze. It’s lovely. An hour and a half later, I get up, get redressed, repack all my electonics (that have been charging while I rested), and get BACK on the bus to the hospital.

You’d think that would be the end of the story but NOOOOO.

Guess where the kiosk sends me? Yup. But at least this person understood right away, wrote an appropirate number on the back of my ticket…I waited briefly then FINALLY got the Admissions window. We got through all the stuff…eye surgery, no guardian, cheapest room please, I get my bracelet and up I (try to) go to the 4th floor.

The elevators are a little odd, they’re on both sides of a wide hallway, and the 4 elevators for the odd-numbered floors are one side and the 4 elevators for the even-numbered floors are on the other side (ooh, same for side and dies). How many times have I been to this hospital? And this is the first time I’ve noticed that. So for once I get myself on the proper side from the get-go, waiting for an UP elevator, get on and try to press the button for the 4th floor. My vision is bad, it’s sort of hard to see but I swear there is no 4 button. Someone else on the elevator realized what I was searching for and just pressed “F.” And then I remembered that the number 4 is considered bad luck in Korea…so I guess the F represented Four.

In my goshiwon I live on the 4th floor and press the 4 button every day.

OHHHH. That could explain a lot.

ANYWAY, when the door opens at F, another patient takes my arm and walks me over to the other side (the odd-numbered floors) and points to the 9, says “koo,” like…huh?? I said, anyo (no), SA (four). AHHHHH she says, then walks me through the closed doors to the floor and shows me to the nurse’s station.

What was THAT about??

Anyway, At this point in the day I am just like…so confused by everything. A nurse takes me in and starts doing all the things, what meds are you on, any allergies, how are your teeth, do you have a guardian, etc etc. It’s a lot of translation apping and me signing things I do not understand.

Then, kahp-jug-hee (all of a sudden), she goes JIGGUM!!! (right now!) – go to the angwa (optholmalogy dept), JIGGUM! Like…you’ve been jerking me around all day and now *I* have to hurry?? Ha. At least I was still in my clothes. Last time I had to put on the hospital costume first and then they pushed me around in a wheelchair to do all the eye things…when I was sitting, the top kept opening (it’s a v-neck button down) and showing too much boob and belly so I had to keep clutching the fabric parts together. At least I was spared that.

I went back downstairs (on the correct elevator), took a number from the opthalmology dept kiosk and waited my turn to go in and get drops in my eyes then get whisked through all the different rooms for the different tests. I always feel like they take me through faster than other people. I do all the tests, I see the surgeon FINALLY. Blah blah blah she says. And now I get to ask – the surgery is on Wednesday, right??

Dr:Yes.

Me: Then what am I doing tomorrow?

Dr: Nothing.

Me: Quizzical look on face.

Dr: Well, you can go out during the day but come back in in the afternoon.

Me: What am I doing tonight?

Dr: Nothing.

Moment of silence.

Me: Then…can I go home NOW…and come back tomorrow afternoon??

Dr: Uhm…I think you can. Yes. That would be fine.

THEN WHY HAVE I BEEN HERE ALL DAY, MINUS 2 HOURS WHEN I MANAGED TO ESCAPE??? Why didn’t they just “admit me” when I was there at 9:30am then say I could go home and return Tuesday afternoon?? Why?? Why? WHY??? 

But okay, okay, good. I have to go back upstairs to get my overnight bag that the nurse up there told me to leave while on my angwa journey. I get off at F all by myself (and they say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks) and go to pick up my bag and I am WHISKED to my room, shown my clothes on the bed, she’s pulling the curtain closed so I can change and I’m like no no no JIB-EH KAYO! I’m going home!

Oh the shock and horror on their faces. What? Why? What? Back out to the nurse’s station we go so I can try to explain that the surgeon, not 15 minutes ago, told me I could go home and come back tomorrow. Okay okay they said. Then tried to get me BACK to the room! Ha ha. At this point I was like I AM JIB-EH KAYOING no matter WHAT you say.

Finally the head nurse called The Powers That Be who said that yes, I was allowed to go home. I had to sign a bunch of things, I guess saying that if anything happened to me OUT THERE while I was tachnically admitted to the hospital, that it was on me. OKAY FINE LET ME GO HOME.

Every Nurse: BUT YOU’LL BE BACK TOMORROW AT 4, RIGHT??

Me: gone.

And I took the SECOND uber of the day.

Honestly: 2 busses, 2 ubers, + 1 crappy breakfast = $27. Getting to go home? PRICELESS.

But the waste of the day?? UNFORGIVABLE

I got home at 5:20pm. Exhausted, sweaty, and so annoyed.

The one bright spot is that I actually took one of the xanax this morning, knowing how anxious the whole hospital ordeal makes me. And it worked. No anxiety. ANNOYANCE, yes…but no anxiety.

And later, my friend Giorgio and I went up to the roof with ice cream bars and just chatted.

The End.

OH so the reason they wanted me to be admitted on Monday when the surgery wasn’t til Wednesday (this was another question for the surgeon) is because Tuesday is Presidential Election Day (remember their “current” president was impeached so this was a snap election to get a new president) and Election Day is a government holiday and they don’t do admissions on government holidays.

That was the explanation, but I don’t think it was a good enough reason. Why not just surger me on a different day, that’s NOT the day after a government holiday? Or, since the surgery is not til 9 or 10 in the morning, why not just let me come to the hospital that morning and not make me stay over at all? This just seems like a situation that could have been so easily avoided.

AND…why not schedule the nephrologist’s appointment for while I’m admitted to the hospital? Instead of making it a separate appointment, making me spend more of my time?  I mean, I know why…so they can bill separately for that consultation. But I’d gladly agree to pay for it while admitted, cuz then it would be an In The Hospital Activity, a way to pass the long, boring time…instead of using, yes I’m going to say it again, MY TIME. 

Anyway. In the end, I had a good night’s sleep and am now having a leisurely(ish) morning before I have to re-pack and go BACK to the hospital at 4pm.

Just in case you were curious.

OH – and a cute moment in the day (gotta make sure we don’t miss those!) was when I was done in the opthalmology department and headed back up to F, all the nurses at the station got up and said “beh-TEE! ANYONG!” (which is “familiar” hello and goodbye) and waved the Korean wave. Which was adorable. They’re all very cute.

Okay, goodbye.