Ever opened your wardrobe and felt like your clothes were… judging you? Not horror-movie style, more like an exasperated best friend shaking her head with a sigh.
Welcome to the imaginary but deeply revealing world of “what your clothes would say if they could talk.”
What Your Clothes Would Say If They Could Talk About Sale-Rack Mistakes
“I was 70% off! You promised I’d be your ‘going out’ top. But here I am—still with the tags on, silently itching in the corner. You knew I was itchy when you tried me on, but you ignored that because you only tried me on for like 1/10th of a second, and you were so dazzled by the saving that you didn’t notice how uncomfortable I really am!”
We’ve all been seduced by a bargain. But that “too good to leave behind” top knows it was never really right for you. Sale guilt? If your closet’ is full of it it’s time to reassess your shopping habits and create some personalised style criteria that you stick to when shopping.
What to do? You want to create a style recipe (I’ve got heaps of blog posts about that here plus my new video masterclass Rediscover Your Style will walk you throught the process – watch it now).
What Your Clothes Would Say If They Could Talk About Those Jeans that are the Frenemy
“You’re hoping I’ll stretch and become comfortable. I’m hoping you’ll move on.”
That not-quite-right pair of jeans is the emotional rollercoaster you didn’t sign up for. They might fit in theory, but in practice? They’re holding a grudge—and your confidence hostage.
What to do? When shopping for jeans don’t buy a pair that’s not quite right in store as they won’t improve when you get them home. Jeans stores often have great staff who know their cuts who can find you the right one for your body that will make you feel so much better.
What Your Clothes Would Say If They Could Talk About That Favourite Dress? She’s Got Attitude
“Look who remembered I exist! I knew Lara would compliment me. She always does. That woman has taste.”
Your go-to outfit knows it’s the MVP. She’s smug, and honestly, she deserves it. But she wants more company in the ‘feel amazing’ category. Why isn’t the rest of your wardrobe pulling its weight?
What to do? You need to figure out what it is about that favourite dress and why it works so well so you can add those qualitities to your personal style criteria and use them as a guide when shopping or just for assessing everything you’ve already got in your wardrobe – to keep or to rehome.
What Your Clothes Would Say If They Could Talk About The Forgotten Fitness Gear That Had Dreams
“You bought me for Pilates. You used me as pyjamas and cleaning.”
We’ve all had aspirational clothes—those pieces bought for the person we hope to become. And while stretchy leggings are forgiving, their dreams of studio glory remain unfulfilled.
What to do? Make your health a priority. My favourite movie of all time, The Princess Bride, includes the line “If you haven’t got your health you haven’t got anything”.
All the research points to the incredible health benefits of exercise, and even if you’re like me and don’t find it enjoyable in particular, knowing that I’m less likely to sucumb to all sorts of nasty diseases because I do daily exercise (walking my whippets) and head to pilates and yoga classes at least 4 times a week means that your fitness gear will get the love and use it deserves. The added benefit is knowing that you’re doing something great for yourself and for those who love you.
What Your Clothes Wish You Knew
If your wardrobe could talk, it wouldn’t just throw shade, it’d offer some wise advice:
- “Stop buying clothes that don’t suit your body or reflect your style.”
- “It’s OK to let go of what you don’t wear, your future self will thank you.”
- “Your favourite outfit isn’t a fluke. You can feel that good every day when you have the education in colour and style to keep making great decisions.”
And it’s true. With the right tools, your wardrobe can become your biggest ally. My 7 Steps to Style program teaches you exactly how to figure out what suits your body, your colouring, and your personality—so you stop settling for ‘meh’ and start dressing for you.
Need a second opinion? Take my Personality Style Quiz and find out what kind of clothes should be speaking on your behalf.
Recommended Reading
10 Ways Personality Is More Important Than Body Shape When Choosing Flattering Clothes
How Your Clothes Impact Your Confidence: Unveiling the Power of Personal Style
Why Style isn’t Shallow and Why Improving Your Style Gives You Greater Confidence
